With horror films and remakes all the rage, the time is ripe for a new spin on the beloved Rom-Com About a Boy. The following is my proposal for About a Demon Boy, a spooky spin on the tale of love and growing up. Any similarities of my proposal to the Wikipedia plot summary of About a Boy are completely coincidental so don’t even check please.
Will Freeman lives a serene and luxurious lifestyle devoid of responsibility in London thanks to substantial royalties left to him from a Halloween song composed by his father, a peppy novelty hit titled “Little Demon Boy”. Will begins attending a support group, called SPAT (Single Parents Alone Together), for single parents as a way to meet women and as part of his ploy, invents a two-year-old son named Ned. His plan succeeds and he meets Suzie. Will brings Suzie on a picnic where he meets Marcus, the 12-year-old son of Suzie’s friend, Fiona.
Will gains Marcus’ interest and trust after he lies to a park ranger to cover up for Marcus accidentally (or so Marcus tells him) killing a duck. Afterward, Will and Suzie take Marcus home down an abandoned, winding road to the large, creepy mansion that Marcus and his mother live in. They find Fiona in the living room, writhing in pain, foaming at the mouth, and speaking in tongues. Will notices an empty pill bottle on the living room table and they call the ambulance to get help for what they think is a suicide attempt. As they wait for the ambulance Will is shaken when he notices Fiona pointing to a picture of Marcus on the mantle and garbling what sounds like “he made me do it.”
Marcus attempts to fix Will up with his mother in order to cheer her up, but the plan fails after a single date. When Will arrives home with Fiona after their bland and uninspiring date Marcus flies into a rage when he finds out that their relationship isn’t going to work out. He bounces from wall to wall in the living room, shrieking at the top of his lungs, violently knocking over bookshelves and shattering vases left and right. Will is petrified with terror but Fiona looks unfazed and starts softly singing “Little Demon Boy” which seems to calm Marcus down. As Fiona wraps Marcus in her arm, cooing “Little Demon Boy” into his ear, the room magically puts itself back together.
After Fiona sends Marcus up to bed for the night Will asks how she knows that song and she tells him that it was a lullaby passed down in her family from generation to generation. She also mentions that some scumbag stole it a few decades ago and got rich off of it without giving any credit or money to the family. Will slinks out of the house without revealing his relationship to the song or the scumbag who stole it.
With that behind them, Marcus becomes close to Will after blackmailing him with the knowledge that “Ned” doesn’t exist. Will, terrified of angering Marcus again, begins to treat him as a surrogate big brother. Marcus’s influence leads Will to mature and he seeks out a relationship with Rachel, a self-assured career woman, bonding over their experiences raising teenage sons, though Will neglects to explain his relationship to Marcus. Will, realizing that he desires true intimacy with Rachel, decides to be honest with her that he’s not Marcus’s father and also that Marcus might be the spawn of Satan, but this backfires and their relationship ends.
One day, Marcus comes home from school to find his mother crying in the living room. Marcus goes to Will’s apartment and attempts to tell everything to him, but Will is withdrawn following his break-up and slams the door on him. Seconds after the door is closed Will hears all hell break loose in the hallway. Lights exploding, people screaming, the large voice of Satan proclaiming doom to all mankind…but when he opens the door he finds everything as it was just a second ago. Will hides under the blankets on his couch, his sadness now peppered with fear.
Marcus decides to sing at a school talent show in order to make his mother happy. Will attempts to return to his previous lifestyle, but finds it unfulfilling. Will realizes that the one thing that means something to him is Marcus, even if he is the devil incarnate, and decides to help him. He crashes a meeting of the single parents support group to find Fiona and beg her not to commit suicide. She assures him that she has no plans to do so and reveals that Marcus has decided to sing at the school show that day.
Will realizes this will be a huge embarrassment for Marcus and rushes with Fiona to the school to stop him, but Marcus is steadfast in his decision to perform, believing it will be the only thing that will make his mother happy. When Marcus steps on stage and sings his mother’s favorite song – “Killing Me Softly with His Song” – the student body starts to taunt him. Suddenly, Will appears onstage with a guitar to accompany Marcus for the rest of the song, earning themselves a modest applause.
Right as Marcus as Will are about to launch into the final chorus of the song Marcus flashes Will an evil grin and gallons upon gallons of pig blood fall from the top of the stage, Carrie-style, directly onto Will’s head. Everyone’s jaw hits the floor. Marcus, pretending like nothing just happened, whispers to Will to keep playing and Will somehow manages to strum the chords to the chorus through all the pig blood that has covered every inch of his body and guitar. Marcus belts out the last chorus and the whole audience sits silently with looks of utter disbelief on all of their faces. Except for Fiona, who is grinning from ear to ear.
The following Halloween, Will is back with Rachel and hosts a party at his place with his new extended family. The idea of Will marrying Rachel is brought up and Marcus seems unenthusiastic. Then, while everyone is at the dinner table for the meal, Will’s father’s song “Little Demon Boy” comes on the radio and Rachel mentions how cool it is that Will’s father wrote that song. Will rushes to shut off the radio but when he does everyone falls silent. The room is thick with tension. Fiona glares at Will and Marcus clenches his fist. Will tries to explain but as soon as he stammers out a few words Fiona nods at Marcus who flies out of his seat and across the table at Will, knocking him out of his seat and onto the floor.
Fiona slides over to the radio to turn “Little Demon Boy” back up and to this upbeat soundtrack Marcus proceeds to relentlessly maul Will. Marcus’s body starts glowing red and horns sprout from his forehead and his hands turn to big claws which he uses to open a portal to the underworld on the dining room wall. Through the portal we see a group of devilish ghouls dancing in joy and beckoning Will to join then. Rachel tries to stand up but Fiona holds up her hand to stop her and Rachel sits back down. The rest of the room is too terrified to do anything but watch as Marcus slowly drags Will through the portal to meet his fate.
The last shot is of Will and Rachel’s house from the exterior. It is all dressed up in Halloween decorations, trick-or-treaters wander through the neighborhood, and we can see the red glow and hear the commotion going on in the dining room. Marcus reveals in voice-over that he didn’t want to to do this to Will, he actually quite liked him and really appreciated all that he did for him since they met, but he explains that sometimes sons must pay for the sins of their fathers and that now him and Fiona can rest easy knowing that the debt to their family has finally been repaid.
Slam Zuckert is a municipal bureaucrat. He sees a lot of movies and reads a lot of books and sometimes writes about them. His favorite movie is There Will Be Blood, his favorite mathematician is Georg Cantor, and his least favorite mathematician is Leopold Kronecker.
Keep it Going Louder 